17 February 2012

Just for Kicks: The Pre-John Green Experience


#21 - The Pre-John Green Experience

There once was a girl.  

Wait, nevermind.  I don't know why I try sometimes.

You all know who John Green is, right?  Okay, chill.  (Don't ask "what for?"  I know you're looking at me like I'm stupid because everybody who calls themselves a reader knows of the eternal, literary deity who goes by the name of John Green.)  I would just like to point out that the first time I'd ever heard of John Green, I developed a certain kinship towards him because my brother's name is John.  This is, let me tell you, not always the case with those fortunate enough to be called "John".  For example, my English teacher's first name is John and he's marrying my history teacher.

Anyways.

So I'm going to tell you the pre-story.  And I will not start with "there once was a girl" because I am so lame that even that statement is above me.

(Just a pre-pre-story note:  the fact that the picture for this meme features a John Green novel is simply a coincidence.)

I was first introduced to John Green several years ago, probably back in my thirteenth year of life or thereabouts.  My best friend told me that this guy wrote a novel that was amazing and that I should read it.    It was called Looking for Alaska and it looked kind of interesting.

Now at the time (because I'd been home schooled for three years at that point and we all know what home schooling your child does to them) the book was a little beyond me.  Hell -- at that time Just Listen by Sarah Dessen was scarring.  I was more interested in medieval wars and people getting beheaded than a girl who gets raped.

Confession:  I only got halfway through Looking for Alaska because it freaked me out.

So I wandered for the next four-and-a-half-years going from book to book, hearing all about this literary god and his incredible manifestations of greatness.  I'm talking about people who had only ever read one book in their entire miserable lives were recommending his books to me.  And when I delved into the blogosphere, it only got worse.

From the outside looking in, I always thought he was hilarious because I found a few quotes from his books on Goodreads and I followed him on Twitter and I was feeling pretty cool towards him in a I-think-you're-a-cool-person-but-I-haven't-read-your-books-yet, awkward kind of way.

I bought The Fault in Our Stars on a whim.  On a whim.  I bought this book for no other reason other than I fell into Amazon's well-laid trap: I didn't want to pay shipping and I needed something to get me over $25 and I couldn't for the life of me think of any other book to buy.

So I bought the freaking book.  Knowing full well that I might be falling into another trap.  An anti-non conformist trap.  Falling into a conformity trap.  That sucks.

The book doesn't, though, so I guess there are small mercies.

Confession: I am not even halfway through the book yet, so chill out on the spoilers.

Translation:

DON'T POST SPOILERS IN THE COMMENTS.

Stay tuned for the Post-John Green Experience.  Coming soon to a blog near you.